I'm not that busy now YET, so you'd probably see my face more often here on blog. But totally not on instagram. Currently no nice photos for my ig feed. Soon soonnn!
Or maybe I'm just here cos I came across something to talk about and it would be merely a short one.
And I came to...this.
This takes me back to a moment I'd rather keep it myself but feel more opens up to share it here now. Could be something (to learn?) to share with you guys.
So...Say "hi" first? For me, I'm a moderate introvert and I don't really talk to people unless they are fellas I trust and feel comfortable to be with (and, someone I need to work with). And Imma girl, Muslim girl some more. If it's to start a conversation with my own species, I'd be more than happy to do that. But...to even say "hi" to a guy? Gross. I'm not sure if I'd ever do that even if you offer me $10Million.
Here's a story while I still remember it. Being in a International campus here, I knew quite a lot of people differ than me in race, religion, culture and language. I like it so so much. Despite the fact that I am the only Malay among my classmates and I never feel odd with them (I love and care about them so much hehee). This surrounding actually nourishes me and makes me grow as a person and as a Muslim most importantly in a way I never expected and alhamdulillah Allah always be there for me though sometimes I feel insecure to be the only Muslim.
We also have exchange and transfer programmes among campuses at Heriot Watt. Students from Edinburgh and Dubai can come here, Malaysian students can also go there. Last year, students from
Edinburgh came here for exchange programme, and some of them of course Mat Salleh. They came from various countries and some of them are Norwegian. I likeee Norwegians so much, I find them not like other typical Mat Salleh, they are nicer and more friendly. For me, they are like Japanese in Mat Salleh version. I hope this compliment is not too overrated for some poeple haha. Anddd by the way their country is also beaaaaautiful. One of my bucket list to travel tooo. I've learnt their language a bit and so far, twas good!
Okay, actually there's this person I adore since the first time I saw his smile (ok, sentimental session guys? haha). And he's a Norwegian. I was one of the photographers for the orientation programme, that's where I got to know them closer (omg I hope they don't read my blog). Cos they are not even my classmates, so, how do I talk to them? Like it'd be so weird to suddenly approach them unless you're their classmate so you all can hang out together etc...
To make it short, I saw him a few times at campus and most of the time, he's just alone. Looking so smart with his casual white t-shirt, shorts and cool sunglasses. I never think I should approach him, just looked at him at a glance and done. He's always so friendly to the Makcik & Pakcik at our bakery cafe here, with his smile, and the way he looks and responds to his surroundings, very politely and quite adorable too. He's sooo unlike typical majority Malaysians I know here. I bet he should be a nice guy. There was once I had lunch at the same place, at the same time and he's also there. We were both sitting alone. My mind wandered around and mumbled,
"He's 22, but looks even more matured than me. I'm 20 and too small to talk to him -__-. I shouldn't say "hi" or anything. But he looks friendly and warm enough to be approached by Malaysians. Why would he come to Malaysia if he's not interested to know Malaysians? Is he actually okay if I go approach him? Omg isn't that weird? Or is it only a Malaysian' thinking?"
Gossshh no no I won't say anything to him. But know whatttt, I even thought of passing by in front of him and pretend like my coffee cup dropped in front of him or something, just so that I could at least say, "Oh God, sorry! Did it spill on you?" And he would have a reason to response to me then we could begin a conversation, right? Kahkah, what the heck, in my dream can lah!
I also once saw him across the 365 Room, he's sitting on the couch with his Macbook, eating maggie cup! I didn't see what flavour. Probably curry or chicken flavour. I thought again "Omg should I go talk to him? So kesian he's alone there. Oh not now, he's probably under his me-time." There were also Malaysians group in the room that time, must be so embarassing if he refused to talk to me back. Hahaha :( So I just proceeded with my own work.
Again, on another day, I bumped into him in elevator, he's with his friend, three of us were going up. I was going to 1st floor while they're going to 2nd floor. When the elevator stopped at 1st floor, he's suddenly walking out of the elevator but he shouldn't cos he's going to 2nd floor righttt (Okay guys get ready, this was the first time I talked to him!!!!). Before he left the elevator, I looked into his blue eyes (lol!) and told him, "Urm, this is 1st floor." and he said, "Ohh.." I actually wasn't really aware what he's said to me back hahaha *so in the air already*. Then I walked out from the elevator, leaving him, cos that's where I was supposed to be, 1st floor. Without turning back or saying "bye bye", I just walked away :/ Hahahaha, not that I was supposed to say anything right?!
Unfortunately, that's the end guys. Guess what, that was the last time I saw him. I'm not sure whether he's in the exchange programme which lasts only 4 months or the transfer programme which lasts for a year. But the other two Norwegians took the exchange programme and I concluded that 3 of them would prolly took the similar programme. Basically, he's not here anymore now. I once read an article about him, written by our Journalist here in Heriot Watt, as he represented one of the exchange student here, the last sentence of the article says that "He's a warm and big hearted guy who's excited to know more about Malaysia and being friends with Malaysian." I was like, "Okay....." I knewww it that he's big-hearted enough to be friends with, but how can a small-hearted me start being friends with him after all...Bye bye, stranger. Oh no, I knew his name, just to let you know, it starts with 'S'.
All in all, back to the topic, if you want to talk to someone, talk to them, go ahead. DO NOT wait for them to talk to you first, it'd never happen until you start it yourself, okay? Especially if you're a guy, that would not be as odd as if you were a girl, like me.
I don't know, if I tried to talk to him, probably both of us could talk on FB or skype now?! Or maybe we could meet somewhere in the Europe? Or maybe he's taken so we shouldn't talk to each other at all =__=" So many possibilities guys, thing is, I didn't try at all. Zero consequences. ZERO.
But still, I'm grateful I didn't do it. Just not the right time yet. Allah hadn't opened my heart yet an I'm happy with my decision. Probably when it's the right time I should start saying "Hi" or to be said "Hi" to, if Allah wills it, I'll surely savor the moment!
Say "hi" and smile! It costs nothing to be nice though ;)