Appreciation post

If there is something I really want to remember about today, it's that despite all the sorrows that I have to face in life, especially now, I want to remember that there is a person that I called a blessing in my life. Despite everything, I thank Allah for lending me this man who gave me endless love and support. Someone who taught me how to love myself ever better than before.

                                               

The flowers he gave on my birthday night. He's so thoughtful to know that I love flowers and this guy always pampers me with flowers! I loveeee them and he chose really beautiful flowers. Really need to buy a number of  pretty glass vasts already!

I am eternally grateful that "that incident" happened on my birthday night, since that, I truly believed that he loved me whole-heartedly.  Not that I never believed before, but the percentage just increased more from the maximum, hahah. My love, my man, whom I feel most safe and happy with. My best-est friend who always made stupid jokes and created funny words, and one who knows exactly what to do whenever I am angry or sad. The gentleman who is always willing to do and go the extra mile for me whenever I need. This whole month, he gave me lessons to learn : (1) to always put my family first over everything (2) to be someone who is not indecisive and just do what I want to do confidently.

For that, my man, my forever "Goblin", I thank you for everything. And may Allah keep you and your family safe and happy always. Much much love, my kind man. <3

p/s: This post might sound cringey and all, but I don't care cos I need a place to remember this feeling. Xoxo!

Dear Goblin,

You came into my life like slow motion,
and not easily I let you in.
While you reacted as fast as meteor,
fast, attracted and confident.
But still, time beats everything,
meteor could fall in slow motion,
Like us happened beautifully.


You made me cry like rain,
but like a rain of blessings,
I feel so relieved.
Because you listened and care about me,
Being opened up wasn't me,
But your support and love made me speak,
and I'm flying free, being the best of myself.


You made me happier and colourful like rainbow,
Showered me with love unexpectedly,
and the bouquet of roses you gave me after a long tiring day,
made me fall for you again so dearly.
Because of the support you gave me sincerely,
to reach my dreams, to be the best of myself.


Time I spent with you shine,
the laughters you made me,
that only I knew how funny your jokes are,
and funnier are the inside jokes.


Time I spent with you shine,
The days we played winning teddy bear,
but did not make it,
and you still strived to find one for me,
because you want to see me happy.


Time I spent with you shine,
the bad days, the good days, both days,
You accompanied and cheered me up me when I'm down,
Celebrate me when I'm happy and success,
I'm happy I get to be with you.


Every day is like a whole beautiful life,
Every seconds I spent with you,
I treat like my last, everytime.
So I get to appreciate it,
not taking it for granted,
forever.


I'm attracted for you like the falling meteor towards gravity,
Beyond grateful for your existence,
And may everyday be our best day forever,
regardless the goods, the bads, and both of them.


Like my favourite scented candles,
I wish you're here everytime I blow them up.



Happy 10th of the month,
my Goblin.

Taraweehs I Love

(Pre-ps : I started this blogpost on Monday 3rd of June 2019, the last night of Ramadhan)

With warm heart, we greeted Ramadhan, and with heavy heart, we bid farewell to it.

I am literally doing that now, currently on my bed, enjoying this last beautiful night of Ramadhan, accompanied by yummy tomyam maggie cup and milk, also a perfect song to suit this blogpost - "I Don't Want To Miss A Thing" by Aerosmith.

Every year, the last night of Ramadhan had always get me all sentimental. I don't like goodbyes, but there's always a silver lightning behind every goodbyes. Alongside the sadness that it's leaving, I took these last few hours as an opportunity to keep enjoying Ramadhan as long as it's still here, and making the time left to spend, the moment that I treasure so much. By now, I'm keeping the night alive, and I don't plan to close my eyes tonight. I'm gonna miss it... a lot. How I wish Ramadhan could extend to a month some more.

Somehow, don't you think that that apply to our life as well? When someone/something is leaving us, or we're the one who's gonna leave, instead of keep on thinking about it's leaving, why don't we embrace every seconds left and making the time last spent as the most meaningful ever? Hence, this blogpost that I would like to dedicate for this special moment.

Throwback to the first week of Ramadhan, I still remember thinking I was someone who used to feel like Ramadhan is another month of tiredness, migraines and tiring taraweeh prayers. As I grow older, I slowly started to recognise the sweetness of Ramadhan. I enjoyed taraweeh more than I ever had. While praying taraweeh during the first week, I did not feel tired at all, then I saw a little girl who counted the rakaah with her mother, who got me thinking that I was like that too, counting one rakaah after another, impatient for the very last rakaah. Hehehe. What I felt now at my age was I did not want the prayers to end (accept for some days when I felt super exhausted like no other hahaha), because I enjoyed the calmness in the prayers, putting aside all the worldly matters away, and the best part was I feel sooo loved by Allah despite the mountains of sins I've done. The moment where I started to enjoy taraweeh so much that I thought, "Ramadhan, please don't leave." The feeling that I yearn for, forever and more. 

Reminiscing this Ramadhan, I admit that I have been imperfect. But to be fair to myself, my goal Ramadhan this time is for me to focus on my internal happiness. I wanted to do what I feel is best and comfortable to me. But an Ustaz's tazkirah had hit me most once he told that what I remembered most was the most important part of our ibadahs are the blessings from Allah behind them. Don't mind the number of ibadahs you did, what matters is, is the ibadah blessed and accepted by Allah? Like people say, Quality is better than Quantity. However, I am certain that no matter what, we still need to seek to perform as much ibadahs as we can, put efforts but emphasized the sincerity and purpose of our ibadahs. Allah is the Judge, and He Sees. But as a servant, we should always pray to Allah that He accepts and bless our ibadahs. 

This "blessings" topic make me relate to another tazkirah I listened to on a different day after taraweeh prayers. He mentioned about the duas that Jibrael angel (malaikat) recited and that Muhammad Prophet s.a.w. ameen to them. We do know that if Prophet Muhammad ameen to the duas, they sure are being fulfilled by Allah, right? There were three duas, one of the duas that I most remembered was if we come to Ramadhan in sins, and leave Ramadhan in sins (because Allah does not forgive us, most probably because we do not ask for forgiveness, too enjoy in worldly matters despite the beautiful month, or do bad things in Ramadhan), our life is not blessed by Allah. The key about Allah's blessings is it helps us in our life, to ease our daily routines, health, money, family, kids, partner, and many more. I am so nervous listening to this, thinking how little had I done in this month.

So, let's pray that may Allah forgive us and accepts all our ibadahs, including the little kindness & deeds that we did. Not to forget to continue the good things that we taught to do and practiced in Ramadhan to non-Ramadhan months too. Also, bear in mind that, Ramadhan leaves, but not Allah. He is always here with us. Despite the special month is gone, it will come again soon. But Allah, will always be here. But let's also pray pray PRAY that we get to meet Ramadhan again next year. May we also be better everyday, in the eyes of Allah, and may Allah bless us all always. Ameen ameen ya rabbal alamin. Love always. :)

Achievement Unlocked

Hi blog, I'm back again! Trust me I have been meaning to write here for so long, but today (or technically yesterday 20/10/2018) I guess I should not slack off anymore! There are a number of things that I dearly want to remember hence I want to write them down so here goes...

It's the 11th day of me being 23 years old since the 11th of October. I could hardly accept the fact that I'm leaving my 'happy-free-confused in a best way 22' age, but alhamdulillah I enjoyed and loved the one year that passed and I am soooo looking forward for what another year has to offer. Every year is full of ups and downs so I prefer to learn every lessons and never forget to savour every moment.

And.... guess what! Yesterday on the 20th of October I just got my achievement unlocked on my first few days of being 23 and alsoooo 2 1/2 months before 2018 ended.

I PARTICIPATED A RUNNING EVENT!

After years of refusing to get out of my comfort zone of trying out a running event since last one that I participated was during my foundation days....

I am not an avid runner but it's my go-to activity every weekend! I do love and enjoy running SO much that I could run and imagine that I literally leave all my worries and problems behind me while doing it. I have been asked to participate a running event and to just try out but I just did not want to *stubborn*. But now I am proud to say, "I made it", guys!

My first 10km medal evah.

Lovin' my Olloum activewear scarf that keeps me looking chic while running :P I have been wearing this scarf for quite a long time for my weekly run and even when I'm just out to buy groceries or even to grab some quick dinner out with family. So convenient and pretty to wear too!

Anywayyyy, it was a 10km #JomKurusRun held at Taman Wetland Putrajaya. I have never been to this place but it was so beaaautiful to run at and such a 'sweet escape' place for a weekend to spend at. Oh by the way, I sacrificed my annual leave for this event anyways (cos I work on Saturdays) =,=" But it was definitely worth it.

It was a quite smooth but still challenging track for me since it's 80% trail and 20% road. The tough part was the trail part cos it's full of rocks I had to jump to get my feet survive. I ran a steady and happy pace for 1 hour and 20 minutes with the help of my mi band which tracked my heartbeat rate that whenever it went almost above my maximum heartbeat rate I had to slow down otherwise I scared I fainted guysss. Nevertheless, I feel SO proud of myself looking back at my running record! For someone who did not train consistently and first time trying a run at 10km straight, pats back for trying, girl! 

Guysss I have been dying to finish a run non-stop for this distance! Whenever I feel like stopping cos I lazyyy but then I told myself "Just a little bit more girl and after this you can sleep all you want". This reminded me to my sister's advice the day before. Thanks to her! <3

What I will never forget was the people behind me who are super supportive of me getting myself into this ; First, my amazing sister who went a distance to help me collected my race kit cos I could not make it due to work that day. And she motivated me and said a lot of good things especially to just enjoy this event cos I told her I was so nervous and even regretted registering for this run HAHAHA. May Allah bless her!

Second, my brother who's willing to be my company for my first run evah! I could not thank him more for his willingness to drive and waze to the place that morning, ran with me for a while for 1 km but then I said to him just go first okay cos I want to run relaxingly...and he did win but he could not win the prize cos he was just replacing my friend who could not participate that day.  

Anddd last but not least, my coooool Mr.C cum my personal trainer from afar who suggested me this event to participate in, and also the Putrajaya Marathon Night which includes 21km and 42km distance that I thought... oh my god "maybe next year."  

After all, looking back at this day and the days I happily went to run, I am ultimately grateful for the gift Allah blessed me with that I take for granted everyday, which is my legs, specifically. I went back home yesterday being so happy and satisfied with my run then I stared at my legs thinking how amazing Allah SWT creation is. This pair of legs that help me move everywhere and anywhere I want to go, whatever I want to do, and especially the things that I love to do. YaAllah, thank You for this blessing to be able to walk and run, and for everything. 

Also, I also secretly (not anymore now) wished to finish TWO (to be specific) books I'm currently reading that I wish I get to share the content at this blog by summarizing cos I'd really love to. Wish me luck and pray for me!

p/s : To more achievements unlocked for as long as we live -- Don't be scared to try out new things and especially to go for the things you love doing. Love always! <3

My big day! - Graduation Ceremony

The moment of walking on the stage... smiling at the camera... receiving a scroll... of degree! The moment I have been waiting my whole life... The moment I have been imagining myself to be in... it's definitely the most most most historical day of my life. I probably sound like exaggerating it, but how do I say it better, it was a day to celebrate me, my friends, our journey and our achievement. I bet people can tell I had the best smile, that day.

And here I am finally writing a blogpost of my graduation ceremony (which was held on 16th of July 2017) for me to re-read again as one of the day that's full of happiness, celebration, thankfulness and success!

It feels more sentimental to write this when I am now in the industry for almost a quarter year, cause I have never been less than blessed, to carry the honour and responsibility as a Heriot-Watt University graduate Quantity Surveyor. Working life is another story, but it's all about excitement I'm tellin ya.

It was a beautiful day at Pullman Putrajaya Lakeside in the morning and my university plaza in the afternoon (they are just side by side anyway!) I reached there with my family and the first thing I saw was a group of the early birds who were already in their robes and bouquets of flowers, happily taking photos at the hotel compound. Sooooo exciting. It felt surreal that I was experiencing it myself now, you know, the robes & flowers thing. While putting on the robe, nah I didn't expect us to get to wear the mortar board, wasn't physically prepared for that! I already put on my shawl perfectly but the mortar board challenged my temper that day. Alhamdulillah I managed to be comfortable and everything was fine the whole day!

The most important selfie - a selfie with Mom after the first few seconds wearing the robe!

With five of my charismatic classmates, who are now working at the same place with me, doing the same megaproject! 

My source of happiness and studymates at uni!

The whole classmates!

Signing the pioneer wall of fame! 

My message as the pioneer undergraduate (featured by @heriotwattmalaysia instagram, which took place at the same day to celebrate Heriot-Watt University (Malaysia Campus) 5th Birthday!

Working life has been an amazing journey, and I'm getting more excited as days pass for me in the industry, preparing my best self, learn as much as I can to contribute to my beloved country and fellow Malaysians. My love for our country will never fade and now... I present myself to you, Malaysia as your young and energetic Quantity Surveyor <3

The Ramadhan LOVE

"Allahuakbar Allahuakbar..." The echo of Azan for breaking fast time today embarks the official end of Ramadhan this year (24/6/2017). My heart sank. The month of mercy and forgiveness has officially left us. The month that I can count on for me to seek for more forgiveness than usual, to look forward for laylatulqadr, and to be at the state where I feel the closest to Allah.

This year, Ramadhan has been a little bit different for me.  It taught me something more than the previous years ever did.


On the first day of Ramadhan this year, I didn't know what I was actually really looking forward to. I wasn't even so excited to celebrate it. But I was actually looking for something. Something that would take me to another level of a person I can be, someone better, someone who acknowledges the beauty of this holy month, someone who understands more about Islam, and someone who yearns for Allah's love even more. Yes. That's actually what I wanted.


But I had no idea what should I do. I didn't even have official list of Ramadhan goals. But I kept one thing in mind -- I wanted to do my best. I wanted to be close to Allah as much as possible.


Our/My Ramadhan journey surely has its ups and downs. I struggled a lot to be someone who is more patient, more forgiving and more kind. On the other hand, I encountered so so so many blessings and beautiful truth about the world of my surrounding.


As far as I could remember, this Ramadhan taught me :

1) To be a better example of a Muslim to those who do not understand and/or misunderstand  the practice and faith in Islam.

2) To be someone who understands that us, humans came from different background, different experiences, and different personality and then only would we understand why they act in a way that is uncomfortable and unfamiliar to us. (and ... I am still struggling with this) :(

3) To put effort in "progressing" than seeking for "perfection". Ultimately in worshipping Allah through both wajib and sunnah practices.


I was and still moved with the experiences that came to teach me and three of them are as above. They took me back to my intention on the first day of Ramadhan -- to do my very best. and to be closest to Allah as possible.  He gave me experiences that made me think and reflect a lot. Although they are not necessarily sweet experiences, but the way the experiences slapped me on my face or gave butterflies in my stomach are nothing compared to the outcome of them, to help me grow and change my thinking.


Now that Ramadhan left with lessons for me to learn, may all of us could put effort and remain steadfast in doing our best to be a better version of a human and ultimately, a Muslim. :)

And.. thank you Allah for the Ramadhan love. You love us so much that you heard me, even when I didn't ask things from You verbally :)

(Photo of my favourite mosque of the decade : Masjid Cyberjaya)

Celebrating the arrival of Syawal, the victory month of Muslims, I sincerely apologise for any wrongdoings from the bottom of my heart. May Allah blesses all of us, accepted our deeds throughout the Ramadhan, and take us again to next Ramadhan. Amin!



p/s : Currently sleepy but insisted in posting this entry hence a short one. Thanks for reading!

Breathing new air

After the second week of being employed, I have had a coooolllll 2 weeks of my life already. The newcomers including me, went through an induction on the first day and soon after that, we were brought to our desks! You've no idea how exhilarating it was for me to see a desk with my name on it. The feeling of finally having a job and a project to handle... we were dedicated a big and meaningful project to do. Everybody in the office is doing the same project, just by different roles and obligations. In the one space of office, we are one big family, and we are a team.


The moment I stepped into the office, the situation in the office was as lively as night market, with voices coming from every angle of the room. But sometimes at one moment, suddenly the office turns as quiet as exam hall hahaha. Most of them are men in the room. It's no surprise to me as I know which industry I'm in right now. The existence of me and my friends added around 5% of female in the room? Hahaha.



For this project, we'll all be placed on site. I know the impression that I'm gonna get as one of the five female in the room. Being a junior QS, with my sometimes-soft-and-feminine look, one of the few malays (and muslims), am I good enough to contribute for this project? Hahaha.

(picture courtesy from Google)

Maybe I'm wrong, but MAYBE (just maybe) some of the people would underestimate me, because I look small, young and inexperienced. But hell yeah, I am so going to prove them wrong. What makes them think only men (or older and more experienced people) could do well in this industry? In their eyes, I might look soft and naive, but think before you realize what actually my brain, hands (and heart) can do. *grins* Hmmm just motivating myself right here haha.

  (picture courtesy from Google)

Guys, if you're millennials and currently reading this,  as soon as you get your job, you'd have to always be positive in whatever position you're in, and however much salary you're being paid. But of course, you ALWAYS have to understand and aware of your rights as employees and as humans. Don't be too calculative of your time and effort, but always be brave and strong that don't let the superiors bully you and let you down.


In our 20s, it's time for us to learn, to sacrifice, and essentially, to GROW as much as you can, be it mentally or physically, build your networks and nurture relationships that bring out the best in you.


Definitely I'm so excited for my career and can't further wait to contribute to the industry. For now, I have my own goals for the path I chose. But ultimately, I want to learn a lot, and soooo thrilled to finally be able to give back to my country! Alhamdulillah.

Graduating!

At the age of 21 (my 22nd birthday is this coming October, so not yet 22! Haha).... I am finally graduating BSc. (Hons) Quantity Surveying! I...... got a degree! It is everyone's dream to make themselves and their parents proud for each of their achievement. I am ultimately thankful, blessed, HAPPY, satisfied with this achievement. Only Allah knows the struggle each of us had to go through, so only from Him the reward would be. To have received my final result in this holy month of Ramadhan, it is nothing but a blessing, rizq (gift) that Allah has decided is the best for me. I could feel that wonderful things await in my future and I definitely can't wait for more learning processes, improvement, adventures and so much more. The #fightsong continues.

Especially... when my job is starting tomorrowwwww! I forced myself to blog today, for me to write about finishing degree, because 5th of June 2017 will be historical in my life. First day of official job! And I'm definitely so excited! Pray for meeeeeee!

Finally, Salam Ramadhan Al-Mubarak and I hope it's not too late for me to again apologise for my mistakes, remind me on any unsettled debt and you may private message me if there is anything unresolved between us. May Allah accepts our deeds throughout this holy month of Ramadhan and forever inshaaAllah.

Oh, my convocation will be on 16th of July 2017! Will update an entry for that soon!

Thanks for reading, xo!

2017

2017 is here!!!  I am definitely so excited to start off this year. And YES I'm back here for my White & Evian's first ever post in 2017. I was in front of my lappy doing dissertation and took a break by listening to Matthew Hussey, my favourite relationship guru, he's amazing! So what I learned from him just now reminds me to blog again! I would LOVE to blog whenever I came across something new or something I would like to discuss about which I find really beneficial for me and fellow friends, I definitey want to share!

Stay tune inshaaAllah I'll be back! but first, here's to a more awesome, blessed, and excited 2017!!

(throwback to one of my fav picture on my favourite family hoilday!)

#Iamstillblogging

A huge apologies I owed to my own blog and all of you for being MIA for quite some time (I know it's a longggggg time). Many things happened and I'd loveee to share everything here! Stay tuned.... because I am still blogging!

The whole lot of Semester

Before it's one month after a blogpost, I'll better update a new one because... lots of things had happened and I better not delay any blogposts. Procrastinating has been my hobby these days, I abandoned almost everything just for myself to be able to lie on bed and.. sleep (uni days are happiest days). Now, playtime's over and here I am!


Guess what, my second year in uni just over! Except the part that exam is coming... uhm, never mind. I'm feeling a bit of emotional knowing the fact that my university days coming to an end already... Next September will be the start of my final year (InshaaAllah if I passed all the subjects hehe). One year is just as short as a month. Like now, in a blink of an eye, my 21st birthday is coming... University (and single) days are the happiest aren't they? I get to spend tonnessss of time just for myself and my truly loved ones. Until your long distance friends keep calling you for skype and you're always unavailable then you start to realize... that you're not living in your own world, go socialize pleaseee. Haha.


However, this semester has been TOTALLY  CHALLENGING, YET WONDERFUL AND AMAZING. It has been a journey with ups and downs and that's always been the most wonderful part of it. Through tweets & instagram, I did update my daily things quite frequently. But I will do it specially for blog too, 'cos one day I know I will reread it and promise not to laugh at myself.

So, chronologically in reverse... 

SPYTL Scholars Dinner

Here I got to meet some of the staff, Ex-scholars and Scholars of YTL. Was so excited to be able to meet new friends from a University of my favourite state, Universiti Malaysia Sabah, to also mingle with the staff of YTL who are very very nice and cute in person! I thought they all are serious and formal like that but nahhh, they are cuter than me! I got also to learn more about YTL Foundation and what they have done, that I find that their objectives really suit my soul and goal, which is to inspire people to be better and have a better life. I wish I could utilise the platform here to be just what I want, to inspire people all over the world :). Now, I get more excited to join them as an intern this coming summer. Weeeee. 

International Construction Week 2016

Here, I learnt a lot on construction industry and fell in love even more and more. The feeling when I once googled and researched about this one thing for assignment and still clueless until I went to this convention. The concept this year is ecobuild which is really MY THING. Ecobuild such as sustainability, green building, IBS all those things are definitely my field of interest. Develop the nation, profitable project but at the same time protecting the environment, who doesn't want that?? I'd definitely go for this topic for my final year thesis. Hehe.  For those who didn't get to go this year, you might want to join next year. I might go again next year thoughhh.

My friends and I all had to wear smart casual that day. But I think everyone looked formal instead. They all looked pretty and smart! Can't wait for the day everyone will dress in business attire which is really adorable in my eyes.

And... Next!

The RISM (Royal Insititute of Surveyors Malaysia) QS Race 2016

It was a veryyyy fun game! I enjoyed every bit of it very much. We struggled though to complete given tasks. The picture above was when we were completing cost estimate (which we have NEVER done before). Basically the game was that we were required to go to every station using public transportation as given in the instruction. At each station, we got to do tasks regarding QS Job of course like cost estimate, bill of quantities, payment certificates, form of contract etc. There are bonus tasks where we'd be given bonus for extra 15 minutes time which will be counted together when we reached the finishing line. And... 15 minutes penalty also given if we couldn't finish task within 30 minutes. Plus, no phones allowed during this race! Only our accompanying lecturer's phone of course. Our phones were taken first before the game started.

 One of the tasks we needed to do was to take a creative picture with the most number of likes to promote Uda Legasi...

 We reached the finishing line first! So exhausted yet happy faces... with our accompanying lecturer (not from the same Uni) who was so nice to us throughout our journey to and fro.

Project Presentation

We've finally done with presentation and now we already submitted the whole project report! It was a group work and I really enjoyed going through ups and downs with them together, staying until so late at campus, brainstorm like crazy and worked our best of course. Like the Malays always say, memerah keringat. Gitewh. Hope we'd be in the same group againnnnn.

Site Visit & TRIP to Penang!!!

This was the highlight of the semester. Bunch of thanks to Miss Zahirah for organising a very enjoyable yet knowledgeable site visit for us. We visited a residential project at Jitra, Kedah where the Project Manager is a very good architect and he managed the project very wisely. One unit was to be completed in 1 month if they are to be built one by one. Imagine say there are 270 units, then the construction will only complete in 270 units x 30 days = 8100 days = 22 years. Very long, right?? Until the Architect gets grandchild also the project still haven't completed. The targetted completion of all the units is about 18 months if I'm not mistaken. So the Architect concurrently progress the construction process for instance after the foundation has done at a few units, he progressed with walls, and progressed another foundation at another units which he has systematically arranged. A lot of the units have completed already now! Construction projects are actually like magic, smart people are there to make sure they achieve their target. And.. nothing is impossible.

 And of course, as we reached northern part of Malaysia which is verryyyy far until our butt pain, we better visit Penang and eat!!! Bunch thanks to my penang people friend, Jolene for taking us a tour in Penang which has been definitely wonderful. I finally made it to Penang Hill (Bukit Bendera) which is suchhhh a beautiful place.

 I still can't move on from this Asam Laksa.  I won't explain more, just look at those chillies. The aunty so nice, I told her, "Spicy, please." And she gave me A SPOON OF CHILLIES oh mai god. I was just...... #speechless #heaven.

High School Friends

Despite the hectic schedule, as long as possible, I will always try my best to make time for my old friends of course. I met Eisya, Aiman, Wafa, Nadia, Arif in both March and April. These people are amazing. We laughed, talked a lot and all those things that took me back to my SAMURA time. Oh dear, high school.

Hot air balloon date with my sayang, Eisya. The person I always look forward to meet again! Omg this girl, I didn't expect that 6 hours was actually not enough for our date! T__T

When can I kidnap you again?? Hehe. 

I also met Wafa, Nadia and Arif... Omg sometimes I thought a few years passed would change people, but I was definitely wrong. They are still the same, especially WAFA! Omg her rants and laugh out loud ahaha definitely made our day.

And... Aimanani! Remember I wanted to take a picture with her after our matchy matchy blooming peonies?? Hehe. Nahhhh here it goes....

The struggle... So that her peonies can be seen... haha! 

Like, finally.... our blooming Peonies. <3 Heee.

Despite laughters and chats and thousands of pictures, may all our friendships with those we loved are in Allah SWT's blessings. Always.

After a whole lot of things happened during the semester, that I also don't get to update here on blog, I am utterly grateful for all the challenges as well as happiness that Allah granted us all. So....I ended my semester with a good cafe latte at dal.komm. What a blessing! Alhamdulillah. 

Snippets

Life has been busy!

I don't even have the time to sip my coffee now every morning. Oh, that's exaggerating, Nadzirah.  I'm bad at time management and my body is hell why I don't get it why it's always lazy! I got home from Uni quite late everyday this week. Piles of schoolworks waiting to be done. Uni is my first home already this few days. I quite don't feel very well too, also have to deal with some personality disorder in my community etc.


Also...I've been looking at my dream guy (still remember the 'S' guy?) from a distance waiting for the right time to talk to him LOL. Does anyone have any confidence tips? I just realized how wonderful he looks like actually, I mean, oh my God his smile and his eyes. Calms my nerves everytime by just looking at him. What's worse is that he's leaving Malaysia before summer. You guys just wait for my broken-heart blogpost seeing him walk away at the airport. Hahahaha.


I'm also counting days for a very interesting QS Race my friends and I will be participating on the 9th of April! Wait till I update about it. Based on the T&C I've read, the race is gonna be coooolll. It's about using public transportations and answering questions regarding our field at every station. I need to study! And by the way, I just signed my contract for 3 months internship this summer. So excited and yet, so anxious. 

Well, life has been crazy! But that's what spiced up our life, anyway. I loveeeee being busy (????). Hmmm, so positive.

Tomorrow I'll be leaving for a faculty trip which is site visiiiit. So excited to see things I've learnt in reality. Hope you guys enjoy your life despite the hectic schedule. Don't forget your loved ones. Hug and kiss them! One best thing I learnt from a good friend, she said, "Live the moment....." Don't be too worry for unnecessary stuff. Okay!

My kind of solar eclipse

Some people said solar eclipse is not really a good sign to the nature. But I can't believe I just teared just by looking at it at a glance yesterday. Yeah, the glare might be one of the reason, but hey, do you feel me. It's the tears of happiness. The feeling when you got to witness one of the beautiful things happen outside of the Earth. It's unbelievable these kind of things do exist. Subhanallah (Praises to Allah swt).

It was a really magnificent morning. Usually around 8 am it's already quite bright with full sunlight making its way to my house's yard. But this day was different. It was quite gloomy but I could still see rays of sunlight brightened the morning. I was rushing to uni cos I overslept. But it's amazing what turned out to happen the day I started with the beautiful solar eclipse... (although I didn't get to start my day with breakfast-at-home-coffee -__-")

Did you read my previous post when I grumbled about how tiring my day was. It turned out to be really different in 360 degree the next day. I'm unsure if it's my mood or yesterday really was 'my day' . I don't know if any prayers from anyone of you who might happen to be granted by Allah to make me feel better and eased everything for me. Only Allah could do the deeds back to you. I thank you a lot. And of course, to the One who is in control of everything, many thanks and all praises to You, Allah swt.

Hereee. The picture I took during the solar eclipse. Okay it looks like a normal sun -___- of course we can't see it clearly using normal phone camera tsk tsk. Well my eyes did better job than my phone camera. I got to see the exact shape of it. Beaaauuutiful mashaAllah (this moment I began to teary). I didn't get to see the full circle, just the almost-full circle one. 

And look! It was quite gloomy right. I parked my car for a while just to capture this you know. I could see the eclipse alonggg the way from my house to uni! Thanksssss for keeping me company during the whole 10 minutes drive and be the first reason to make me smile yesterday, dear eclipse!

So, dear my beloved friends, if yesterday didn't turn out to be exactly like what you wanted it to be, just be patience and stay grateful. You never know what you're gonna have the next day. Tomorrow is a surprise, isn't it?

Let the universe do its magic....

Positive Vibes

Those days of feeling tired and helpless... Today is the day. 

Those days of feeling less motivated... Today is the day.

Sometimes, we just need help. We need more strength than we ever required.

People look at us like we are capable, hardworking, and independent.

But inside, only God knows how worn-out we are, craving for more strength.

I must say... That's women. You see as if they are independent. 

Meanwhile,

they need people to be there to lighten everything in their shoulders.

I got this from twitter ;

"To all independent women out there who once in a while just wanna cry because sometimes you just don't wanna be independent anymore..

Happy International Women Day."

I still remember how I was motivated with these words last year, 

"Women empower one another"

These four words which have given me more courage,

These four words which have brought me back closer to my soulmate, Allah,

These four words which have made me thankful with my life,

These four words that constantly open my heart wide to forgive,

These four words that once inspired me to let go of a guy I used to love for a woman who needed him more,

These four words that make me want to make every women in this world happy especially the woman of my life ; Ibu.

So... Again,

Happy International Women Day.

Stay who you are, and in case you are tired (like me noww), 

Stay courageous! But remember to be HAPPY. (:

The After SPM

3rd of March that day SPM result 2015 was released. Reminds me a lot to the moment my batchmate and I in the big hall of SAMURA, coming with the same outfit theme which was white, anxiously waiting to know whether the result paid our sweats and tears throughout the two years struggling together. It was a very good memory as for our batch that time in SM Sains Muar, we managed to   bring up SAMURA's name again and at the same time remained as Sekolah Berprestasi Tinggi. We were called the "Batch of Redemption" at 2012 (the whole year we're taking SPM), and we did it as the name given to us. We managed to 'redeem' better achievement, top 10 in SBP ranking, despite the fact that we have the most number of students sitting for SPM that year among other SBPs which was about 320 something. It wasn't easy for all the teachers, especially. Thank you so much, dearest Teachers :)

After a few years, things have changed anyway. We all now went in separate ways. Well, there are lots of things I learnt throughout the life after SPM result was out, until now. There are two things I'd really like to share with my brothers and sisters out there who've just received SPM result, whether they reached your expectations or otherwise, here I'd like to say :

(1) 

If your result does not reach your expectation, YOU will see a brighter side of your future, something better is planned for you. Jangan pedulikan makcik pakcik dok tanya-tanya, compare-compare kau dgn sepupu lain cakap cam ni, "La, dapat tu je ke?" Hello, makcik, pakcik? Get ready guys to open their eyes wideeeeee. Maybe not as soonest, time has their own way to make things happen anyway, inshaaAllah your highest achievement does not stop after SPM. You have wayyyyyy many things to achieve in your Uni, Master, PhD, Career, Family and Life.

I have friends who did not make it well in SPM, but I saw them happy doing things they never expected to do now. I'm so proud of them! They have travelled the world wayyy more than myself and that's so impressive. From their story, they all wanted straight As / A+s to become doctors, engineers etc. But little did they know the less As result of theirs actually lead them to something they'd really really love to do, and in the best way, what Allah knows the best for them. Allah is the Most Knowing. You just have to trust Him and pray for guidance a lot.

(2)

 If your result is very good and okay you're happy but you are lost in deciding your future and thought that SPM result is not useful in this competitive world, you're wrong. Jangan pedulikan sangat senior-senior cakap, "Ala, setakat SPM, tengoklah nanti universiti macam mana." 

I know, nowadays we are all driven to study abroad and that's our main expectation especially if you got straight As. We can do so many things that we lost in direction of where to go :

Studying abroad :  too expensive

Getting loan : too competitive 

Asking for parents' sponshorship : don't want to trouble parents

Seeking private company sponsorhsip : they don't sponsor for the course you want

Studying in public Uni(s) : you don't prefer

I kindly would like to advice you to think : What kind of working environment you'd like to be in the future? Are you passionate enough? If you're not, are you okay to find ways to gain it? And most importantly ;
What do you want to do to contribute to the world, country, religion, nation, family, and not to forget, yourself? Look at your result slip and think. Some people say, at the end, you're born to just pay the bills and die. 

To my dearest juniors whether you've good or less-than-your-expectation result, actually, at the end, after all the hardworks, when you're about to take your last breath, you will think : What did I really do to LIVE. Did I really live. And you will feel nothing but the best if you know you've contributed enough to the world, to those people in need, and if in Islamic way, to gain Allah's redha and blessings.

Back to the part when some seniors might say that SPM is just SPM, even good result won't help you to survive this world. What I have to say here is that I was thinking the same thing too. I thought the good result was useless up to my PASUM (Foundation in Science at UM) days. I wanted to be so many things like Doctor, Entrepreneur, Politician (hahaha), Quantity Surveyor etc... Too ambitious I think. Being overly ambitious is useless too adik-adik. Haha. Stay focus!

Back in pasum days, I went through hard times surviving but alhamdulillah I did well at the end. I really wanted to be a Doctor actually but I did not apply for any medical course when applying for UPU (because to me, if I were to do medicine, I wanna do it in RCSI or UM), instead I applied for something else. This was actually because my CGPA during the first semester in pasum (they require 4.00 cgpa for medical course in UM and it's really hard to get) wasn't good enough for UM medical course. I have the feeling that I wasn't going to do degree in UM. I also tried another interview (can't remember what uni) in India for medical course but unsuccessful cos I wasn't a 4.00 student in pasum :(

Then, I got offered by UM doing the course I applied, but it was after I was really determined to go and hence already registered in Heriot-Watt University Malaysia in Putrajaya (the first batch as it was just opened), I fell in love with the Uni since the first time my father showed it to me in advertisement in Star newspaper, until now. :) 

So, before I officially started my undergraduate programme in September 2014, a number of emails hit my inbox and some of them are scholarship offers. The annual fee for HWUM is quite costly as this Uni is Scotland-based. I really don't want to let my Dad pay for the expensive fees so I went to seek for scholarship. One of the scholarship offer was YTL. It was the scariest (but realllyy beneficial) experience in my life. The moment I sat down facing the interviewers, the first sentence came out from one of them was, "This is not a normal interview you usually do, but THIS, is your job interview." Wth I was only 18 man haha but it was a really good interview though. After two interview sessions (1 hour for first session, 1 hour and 1/2 for second session, it's a second chance cos I failed the first one hehe), I made it till the end. However, the highlight of this interview relates back to my blogpost is that during my second interview, they mentioned this, "Based on the first interview, you've failed cos you seemed to not have any passion in construction at all. But to look back to your SPM result, it's really really good. You're smart. It'd be so good to have a person like you here." I previously almost cried during the inteview session but this sentence somehow strengthened my gut back, until the very second of NOW. I never thought the SPM result was useful and might be one of the factors they accepted me to be sponsored with full scholarship in hwum. The guy who said that was so nice too, he gave a lot of useful advices and it really helped me to remain strong in accepting where I'm at now.

I'm happy cos YTL is not merely a small company, I could learn a lot from them throughout my working years there cos I was basically bonded with them for 5 years after graduation. Some people say I'm doing QS because my dad doing QS too. It was definitely the most incorrect statement ever. After praying a lot for guidance from Allah, I knew and felt that the decision to study QS in hwum is the best for me. Of course sometimes I doubt, meanwhile feeling stupid in this new thing I'm learning, but it's really really interesting if I look at the brighter side. 

Remember when I said I also wanted to be an entrepreneur? QS is the platform now, guysss. QS is in construction line, we also learn business management, investment, property thing and everything. I never thought I'd love these stuff more than I love Chemistry, Physics etc... 

So, jangan pandai-pandai cakap result spm tak pakai dah, buang dalam tong sampah, bye bye. Haha.

In spite of this lengthy post, don't give up and never lose faith. You will see brighter side of your future. Just keep going, okay? Future is different for everyone. Not necessarily you need to focus on studying medicine, dentists (but if you're doing this now, it's already very impressive! :) ). There are soooo many things you haven't explored in this world yet. Based on what I've read in news and what my father told me is that Malaysia currently needs more brilliant youngsters to contribute in other fields than those fields mentioned above. Go for business, construction, technology, arts, science and many more. You'd make your extraordinary future, inshaAllah !

Kota Kasih - Bali

I'm all pumped up after having Heaven and Earth green tea for dinner just now. And..... Finally here's the free time to post about our family Bali trip during the Chinese New Year!!! I don't care how long has the trip been already (omg, it's 2 weeks), the memory is however still verrryyyy fresh in my mind, and will always always always be among the best memories of us (although it's the 2nd time for us this time). And you have to know why... 

Well, most people say Paris is the city of love. But to me, so far after a few countries visited, Bali is the one. Kota kasih katanya. Speaking of love or kasih, we fantasize nothing but the love between man and woman. Oh gross, the most heartbreaking one. Set that aside, because Love is happiness and beautiful, I've been blessed with a lot of loves alhamdulillah, and that gave me life. The most important love ever is the one Allah granted it to me and my family. We become closer each year (not that we weren't that close before) but as time goes by, I feel them in my blood and soul, that's how I realize how magical my love for them is. 

So, we have been to Bali twice and I just feel that Bali is like our honeymoon set up every year hehe. It's not anymore a place that reminds me of typical love between man and woman, but I'm happy that whenever I'm reminded and called to Bali, it's my family who becomes like the "monument" of the wonderful place. My impression has totally changed since the first time I came to Bali. Though we went for only less than a week, which is really not enough, I have to admit that every second was precious and I couldn't feel happier without my family to be there with me. 

After all, THANK YOU SO MUCH Ayah for the trip!

We had Abang Epul as our supir (driver) there. He's been a loyal and dedicated driver to us in Bali since 2015. Knowing that it's quite challenging to find confidently halal food in Bali, having him as our driver there is definitely making our trip so so easy. Our top favourite food in Bali are of course Bakso Pak Rebo (which you can find in Sanur) and Terang Bulan, dessert like apam balik but a very nice Indonesian version one (I don't have a picture of this so so sorry!)

The Bakso.

The stall from outside. (Bakso Pak Rebo, Sanur)

It's damn nice so please goooo tryyyy if you go Bali. Shoot, regret that I'm doing this at night, now I feel hungry! Where to get same exact one in Malaysia?! I'll be so dead if I crave for this one day if I'll pregnant. My husband will cry.

This year, Ayah belanja my sister, my mum and me to go Spa while my brothers went surfing. Last year we didn't get to go but this year we had more free time so there we are... It was the best moment ever. I wish I could go to this spa everytime I have the usual perturbing backpain in Malaysia. Urgh. Unfortunately the moment I went to the spa that day, I was feeling all well, minus the little migraine. But my body was totally fine, urgh, why didn't you just get tired that day before the spa dear body, I was all fresh and well, fresher after the Spa!

We got to have the spa in a closed area, but sadly I was separated from my mum and sister, left all alone in the room with the spa lady. But I feel special though, it was like a real me time! I don't know how many times I wished the moment of being massaged didn't have to stop... "Don't stop massaging me... Don't stop massaging me... Don't stop your hands there, please!!!" When the first 1 and 1/2 hour finished, I was oh ok nevermind I still have the second one! Hehe. We actually took the 1 and 1/2 hour full body massage and 1 and 1/2 hour feet reflexology. We went to Aroma Spa Retreat, also in Sanur, and it's actually a spa under the Prama Resort. The place is bloody beautiful and relaxing...

Oh, you spelled my name 'correctly'?! and I'm married?!

We were fetched by a car from our hotel, and like usual, the people were so nice. And they treated us all so so so gracefully and nicely wherever we're at (they actually really appreciate tourists). I love how graceful they are the people in Bali. I loveeee Balinese!

Got wet towel and water bottle just before getting into the car. I felt like a Princess. How did they know I need these two?? THANKS A LOT. Wet towel please, I need to stuff this in my face cos migraine's hitting me again due to the super dry hotness. Ohhhh this chill plain water, I need to rehydrate myself most of the time. And a reminder here, I recommend you to go Bali in June, as recommended by the Balinese there, cos it's chiller and less warm, unlike in December-March. Or maybe, just go there when Australia is having winter!

 My single room during our first spa session : Full body massage. Nawwwhh I miss this T__T

Second spa session : Feet reflexology. Was sitting here with my mum and sis. Instead of falling asleep in the single room massage just now, I fell asleep when I had them there with me to talk to. Maybe the foot massage was just too comfortable....

We had the best lunch ever (read : TWICE) at Denpasar. The restaurant's namely Ikan Bakar Cianjur. Not to exaggerate but if you are food lover, don't miss to try their Indonesian dining!!! Cuz you won't regret it! Jangan lupa jugak beli keropok diorang, ada jual dekat pintu masuk. (Tak sempat nak tangkap gambar jugak sebab dah tak pikir apa, terus makan). Sedap gila...

We also went to his restaurant called Sederhana Restaurant at Ngurah Rai near the airport as soon as we touched down Baliiiii. Their specialty here is Nasi Padang! 

Next, we tried Anomali Indonesian Coffee. How do I tell you that it tasted waaayyyyy nicer than Starbucks?! The taste is even softer, cos as a daily coffee consumer, I easily feel dizzy and uncomfortably anxious after consuming coffee, but my experience was different with this one. The "feels" were so calming that I felt like keeping it in my mouth without having to swallow it heheee.

Wish I can get this now..... Noms. We went to the Anomali Coffee cafe in Ubud.

As you see, we went there for 4 days only and the first 2 nights we stayed in Sanur. The consequent night we stayed in Ubud. Our hotel in Sanur was Griya Santrian Resort. The hospitality was of course, the best one, but we didn't really like the room cos we unexpectedly got the kind of 'old' room ones, unreasonable to the price per night (we also didn't get our rooms close next to each other cos Ayah booked each room for two). Maybe the high price is due to its seaside location. Despite everything, we had great time there cos the place is beaaaauuutiful. Here are some pictures :

Breakfast area.

 Me and the welcome drink during checked-in. Btw, they put a LOT of orchids as their main flower for decorations! It's unbelievable how the orchids are all REAL, fresh and beautiful.

I am so sorry I just realized that I didn't take more random photos of view of the resort instead only those views with me in the frame. I had to upload them anyway. Just showing you the view around the resort. :)

And the next day, we went to Ubud. Sorry for being biased, but we loveeee Ubud more than Sanur. Our hotel this time is more reasonable in price and the view was even more breathtaking.  We had sea in Sanur, but because it was extremely hot there (there's no slight of wind!), and we couldn't even walk a lot around the seaside area because dogs were freely running around and it's uncomfortable. 

But differently in Ubud, we had the green view we always wished for. When I first saw Ubud, I was definitely in love. Ubud is more like a traditional place, you get to learn more about their culture here. And of course, I took more pictures in Ubud. :) 

Sanur is actually the most preferred place for the senior citizens. Ramai sangat omputih tua-tua! Most of them might be retirees or spouses who seemed to be sweeter than newly-weds! While Ubud is the place where teens, young couples prefer to go...it's more lively in Ubud than Sanur.

Oh anyway our hotel's name in Ubud is Plataran Hotels & Resort. I rate 9/10 stars for my experience! Soooo gooddddd!

My sister and I's room! 

I took flatlay straight away when we arrived... (I was obsessed with taking flatlays during this holiday actually, hence the lack of views photos). We were very very excited and happy with the transformation from a disappointing room in Sanur to a unexpectedly beautiful room in Ubud. Oh while I was taking flatlay, my sister's busy recording herself talking on how she loved her make-up that day (if you followed her in FB/instagram, I assume you watched it already haha). Well, I had to agree with that because she wore my Russian Red lipstick anyway. Hahaha. 

Chilling restaurant area.

Lobby.

I love the architecture! Of glass and wooden cladding...

The picturesque view while swimming... 

This view <3

The gym. Wish I have this in Malaysia! Heee.

We were lucky cos as the last day we're in Bali, the Balinese were having their Raya guys. It's Hari Galungan & Kuningan. I love to see they all were wearing traditional attire, like a kebaya in my eyes. Everywhere was so merry. We were luckier that we're all in Ubud during the celebration cos Abang Epul said it's the merriest celebration in Ubud and it really was! 

Oh, the girl smiled at me?! I was quite rushing when I took this picture. Didn't notice that she responsed at me! So cute!

Those tall things (I forgot what it's called, I think it's Benjor) are made and decorated with coconut leaves and Abang Epul also told us that we can only find the tallest ones in Ubud! We were lucky again! They were all indeed so tall. The ones we saw in Sanur weren't as tall. They only put these things up during Hari Galungan.

Btw,

Anyone wants souvenir?

Sorry to break your heart but this is the only thing I brought from Bali...

So...

That's all for my Bali post. Hope you feel the Balinese spirit!  This post definitely couldn't even perfectly describe how I love Bali so much. So I recommend you to go hehe. I will definitely return again someday, and like the "Eat Pray Love" movie, we might get to meet our soulmate there hehehe. So so so many mat/minah sallehs in Bali, guys. They also love love love Bali. Many of them make Bali like their own hometown already.

If you have any questions just drop me email or comment or anything!